In Merlin's Shadow #2

Roxanne and her father Emrys finished their silent dinner and Roxanne had begun to fill the kitchen sink with hot water when a knock at the door disturbed their usual silence.
"I'll get it!" Emrys said He opened the door to find a young man at the door.
"Yes?" Emrys asked curtly "What do you want?"
Roxanne's curiosity brought her to her dad's side before the young man could respond and her gasp of recognition alerted her father that Roxanne knew him."Who are you and what do you want?" Emrys asked gruffly and glanced at the boy's brilliant blue eyes.
"Dad, please don't be rude." Roxanne pleaded."I'm sorry for disturbing you sir, I realize…" The young man began
"Leave off the flattery please. I know you're here for Roxanne." Emrys interrupted.
"Daddy. Please, your not letting him answer." Roxanne pleaded again as she stepped closer to the screen door that separated her from this fellow she had met in the library earlier that day.
"Well, sir," He began again."I met your daughter in the library today. Oh," He said realizing he hadn't answered the questions, "I'm sorry I'm not answering your original question. My name is Joseph and well, I met your daughter, Roxanne…" He paused after saying Roxanne because he had never said her name before. He wanted to taste it and remember it forever. He smiled to her and for her."It's a lovely name, isn't it?" Joseph said dreamily to her but realized again that her father was the gate keeper so he turned his gaze back to Emrys.
"Roxanne is a lovely name sir isn't it? You named her well" His sheepish grin made Emrys furious."Get on with it. I have allot to do and so does Roxanne." Emrys interrupted again and noticed Joseph's face with sun-tanned freckles across his cheekbones and Joseph's wild red hair sticking up in more directions than Emrys thought legal. Emrys wanted to hate the boy but there was something familiar about him too. Something that made him feel safe and almost warm inside. So, Emrys decided to push him away as soon as the possibility presented itself. "Well, my name is Joseph sir." "I am not deaf?" Emrys interrupted trying to make Joseph look stupid to Roxanne. "You have already established your name for us, Joseph." Emrys emphasized the name Joseph in a nasty way and Roxanne wanted to hit him for it. "Maybe," Emrys added noticing Joseph's attention upon Roxanne. "If you stop undressing my daughter with your eyes you can state your business and leave us the hell alone."
"Dad!" Roxanne said alarmed.Joseph's face reddened as much as Roxanne's.
"Sir, I would never. I …" Joseph stammered uncomfortably."Sir," Joseph tried again after taking a breath." I really thought this would be much easier. Roxanne is attractive and I understand you must have that reaction by others in public when they see her, I know how human males can be, They only have one thing on their minds don't they?" Joseph smiled uncomfortably. "But really, Sir, I wasn't …" Joseph didn't want to say "undressing her". Because, even the words embarrassed him.
"Excuse me." Emrys said in the obviously uncomfortable pause."I know how human males can be?" Emrys asked rudely. "Are you not a human male?"
Joseph reddened again and his hand went to his mouth realizing he must be more careful. Roxanne thought his embarrassment made him even more adorable. He was no movie star. She could see that. She smiled watching him struggle with her father.
"Did I say that?" Joseph asked. Directing the question with his eyes to Emrys but he meant it for Roxanne. He desperately wanted to look at her again but after her dad's embarrassing accusation he feared she would think he was doing exactly what her father suggested.
"You did say that." Roxanne giggled. " Do you not consider yourself ," She paused searching for the right word. "not human?"
"And you don't have to be afraid to look at me." She assured him. And his gaze became all hers. " My father says things before he speaks." Roxanne said.
"Before he speaks?" Joseph asked completely lost to her. She giggled again sending shivers through him. Had Joseph not been so desperate to impress Roxanne's Dad he would have spun around like a lunatic on a mountain top and broke into song at that moment and it reflected in his eyes. Capturing Roxanne further into a web of what she could have never imagined and catapulting Emrys further towards the fury he intended for this boy.
"And?" Emrys said reminding the boy that he was there.
"Oh, yes, sir." Joseph forced himself to appear to look at Emrys again but his eyes darted to the side toward Roxanne intermittently. "There's a carnival in town, sir." Joseph said. "My mom wanted to meet you." Joseph smiled like a little boy with a bouquet of dandelions for his first girl friend.
"Me?" Emrys asked surprised.
"No, sir. Not you, I meant Roxanne of coarse." He said and struggled not to turn back to look at Roxanne when he heard her giggle at his mistake.
"She wants to meet Roxanne, of coarse." He said hoping to steady the direction of this conversation."You told your mom about me?" Roxanne asked. Joseph was glad to have another reason to look at her.
"Of coarse. And she wants to meet you at the carnival tonight.." He said.
"How do you know each other?" Emrys asked.
"The library dad." Roxanne answered quickly. "I tripped in the library today and would have hit my head on a shelf except Joseph happened to be there and caught me."
"I see." Emrys said digesting it all."And now this boy who can't even comb his hair thinks you are fair game for dating? And wants me to believe his mother wants to meet you at a carnival? What's wrong with this picture?" Emrys asked snidely.
"My mother works at the carnival sir." Joseph told him wondering why Emrys wouldn't like his hair.
"We travel with the carnival, sir." " We're all like a family there really. I grew up there. Well, not just there where it is now of coarse but with the carnival I mean and Mom will be there tonight and wants to meet Roxanne and read her palm and stuff."
"No!" Emrys answered."We don't participate in the occult. That's occult. It's not a game for us. So the answer is no you can go away now and leave us alone. And, don't bother coming back!" Emrys said sternly as he placed his hand on Roxanne's shoulder and gave her a gentle tug away from the door so he could close it.Roxanne resisted and stepped closer to the screen door.
"Please sir." Joseph pleaded."I'm sure my mom and I would agree with you. Mom reminds me all the time that occultish things and dark magic is forbidden to humans. I nor she would ever presume to…"
Upon hearing the attempted explanation, Emrys grabbed Roxanne's shoulder firmly and yanked her backward from the doorway. She lost her balance and fell over her fathers foot striking her head sharply on the floor. In a moment too quick for Emrys to see, Joseph was inside helping Roxanne to her feet.
"Are you alright?" Joseph asked her while he examined the back of her head and relieved there was no external injury. She nodded silently embarrassed. When Joseph was sure Roxanne was alright he turned his gaze and glared into Emrys eyes. Emrys could see nothing but boiling blue. "Don't ever hurt her again. Ever." Joseph said then took a deep breath and became a nervous boy again.
Trying to dispel the guilt Joseph had just sent into his heart. Emrys turned away from Joseph. Familiarity struck him again and he struggled to remember when had he seen a gaze just like that before?
"Are you really alright, Roxanne?" Joseph asked again.
"Get out of my house!" Emrys commanded sternly.
Joseph obeyed but only as far as the screen door. He turned back to watch Emrys slam the front door in his face. So, Joseph opened the screen door and put his ear to the inner front door.
"When did you decide you could start physically abusing me, Dad?" Roxanne screamed."Obviously I would be safer with a stranger than with my own father! And what's wrong with that picture Dad?" She emphasized the word "that". Roxanne stormed from the living room and into her bedroom and slammed her door shut. Then, she looked out her window hoping against hope that Joseph hadn't left. She was more than pleased to see him listening through the front door and giggled. When her bedroom door opened again she was dressed in the only dress she ever owned, an emerald green dress with an iridescent sheen she found in the thrift store some time ago without her father's knowledge. She liked it because it brought out the red in her hair which she thought, was her most becoming characteristic even with her freckles which she hated until she saw Joseph's freckles today. Besides that, she that dress proved to herself that she was indeed girl instead of just some lump. Emrys never allowed her to wear dresses or makeup or anything that would revealed herself as female.
Roxanne discovered her father sitting on the couch rocking back and forth with his arms around his chest, "Like a lunatic." She thought, glad Joseph didn't see this. This behavior of Emrys' had been increasing in frequency of late and worsened with stress which was one reason she never resisted his moods, until now.
"He needs his medication increased" she comforted herself with as she chose her words. "I'm going." She said and noticed the bloody bandage on his right wrist was. Further indication of his stress level. The bandage protected an unhealed wound, which resulted from being struck by a car during his childhood. The other result was his mental illness, secondary to a massive head injury. The wrist bled in times when he was the most stressed and the rocking made Roxanne feel angry. "You're bleeding again Dad. This is not something to get upset about. You can't keep me caged up here like I'm your pet or something. I'm going to the carnival and I promise to be back at a reasonable time and he is not going to hurt me dad. He's different. I can tell." She said feeling bolder now than usual because Joseph was at the door listening and she hoped he could hear her.
Emrys looked at her. He hadn't realized that Roxanne had grown into womanhood and found himself rather taken by her beauty."You're very…" He struggled uncomfortably. He wanted to say the word beautiful but it caught in his mind somewhere.
"You look very pretty." He settled on saying and he actually smiled. Roxanne's heart softened slightly toward him.
"I don't really." She said, fishing for another rare compliment from her Dad. "Yes," He smiled again.
"You do. You are very…" He inhaled. "I can say it." He told himself in a struggle he couldn't understand. "Go on and be the man" he told himself."Beautiful!" The word came out rather loud and rigid but Roxanne accepted with a smile.
"Roxanne…" He said wanting also to tell her that he loved her. But that was unthinkable for him. The words stuck in that same sticky place in his mind and when that happened he only wanted to sit and rock. His wrist smarted. Except for Roxanne's blue eyes which were her mother's, she was the exact image of the woman in his nightmares. He knew they were just nightmares, part of his illness since childhood, but he couldn't divorce himself from the fact that Roxanne had become the exact image of the woman in his dreams, except that is, for her eyes. She had her mother's blue eyes, not the vivid green eyes. "Like the color of her dress." Emrys realized to his discomfort.
"Her eyes were green, green not blue" he began to repeat in his mind over and over. In the place where things stick.Roxanne recognized the look on her father's face now. He had slipped into his inner world again and began to rock back and forth..
"I'll be home Dad." She said giving him up again and she left.

In Merlin's Shadow #1 by Jeff and Mary Strong

"We had to come Dad. I told you we have to do a paper for science. I don't see why you have to make it such a big deal!" Roxanne screamed right before she slammed the car door for further emphasis of her displeasure.
After the car sped away Elizabeth spoke.
"What's up with your father, Roxanne? Stressed over the move here?"
"He's always like that, Elizabeth." Roxanne answered with her face growing increasingly redder from her anger, embarrassment and frustration.
"He hates me. He has always hated me. Roxanne directed her gaze toward the pavement unconsciously trying to hold back years of pent up tears and then into Elizabeth's eyes consciously. Roxanne did not want to appear broken in anyway to this new friend.
"Come on, Roxanne, I'm sure he doesn't hate you." Elizabeth smiled hoping to seem the comforting and supportive friend. Elizabeth feared that she had befriended Roxanne against her better judgment. Everyone in school said Roxanne was freaky and odd. She wore flannel shirts and blue jeans to school every day. She never wore makeup or anything sexy and kept to herself in very odd ways. But Elizabeth decided after last Sunday's sermon to befriend someone who was obviously difficult to love and Roxanne came first to mind. She wanted to be like Jesus to love the lowly and down trodden.
"He has hated me for years Elizabeth and I want to apologize for his rude behavior toward you." Roxanne said and turned toward the library.
"We're here to research right?" Roxanne said.
Elizabeth darted to the door. She was embarrassed by Roxanne's Dad's behavior to her in the car but wanted to try and cover it up until she could talk to her friends about it. It would make interesting conversation.
"Let me." Elizabeth smiled as she opened the door for Roxanne to enter.
"Thanks." Roxanne smiled genuinely. "You make me feel special."
"Announcing Queen Roxanne!" Elizabeth heralded with a forced smile.
Roxanne returned the smile genuinely and lifted her head to appear the more regal. "Wouldn't it be nice if I was a real queen." Roxanne said as she entered convincing Elizabeth that this friendship could never work. Not even Jesus could expect it of her.
Elizabeth caught up to Roxanne quickly because Roxanne upon entering had stopped walking and literally had her nose in the air.
Elizabeth more convinced now than ever of the oddness of Roxanne decided she didn't want to be seen to near this person again.
"Do you smell that?" Roxanne asked clutching Elizabeth's arm.
Margaret the lead cheerleader had just walked in and had to squeeze around Roxanne to get in and of coarse saw Elizabeth with the odd new girl. Elizabeth felt horrified.
"Books?" Elizabeth said trying to break Roxanne's clutch of her arm.
"No, Elizabeth." Roxanne said. "It's something else it's like..."
Roxanne searched for the words as she inhaled deeply again. Now an old man had to squeeze around her to get out the door. She was completely oblivious to anything other than her nose. "It's chocolate. Yes It's chocolate." Roxanne said firmly.
"No!" She squeezed Elizabeth's struggling arm tighter and pulled her uncomfortably close. "it's like rose petals after a summer rain. No! Elizabeth!" she said and whispered into Elizabeth's ear. “It's like wood smoke. You know like when a neighbor burns leaves and wood in their yard."
Roxanne finally released Elizabeth's arm and inhaled again. Now Roxanne clutched her own arms around herself.
"No, it's more like lavender. Yes I'm certain it's lavender. That's it!" she announced firmly finally opening her eyes and looking into the surprised and uncomfortable eyes of Elizabeth.
"Are you completely mad, Roxanne?" Elizabeth asked quite seriously.
Roxanne inhaled.
"You're right, Elizabeth. I must be mad. It's nothing like lavender it's citrus. Is that what you think?" Roxanne smiled again a Cheshire cat kind of smile to no one at all and inhaled.
"But then again Elizabeth? Cedar?" Roxanne directed her attention to Elizabeth again momentarily. "What do you think, Elizabeth?
"I think we came to research this thing about symbiosis and we are supposed to have a list of symbiotic relationships for tomorrow. So, let's move on, Please?"
Roxanne and Elizabeth walked together until they reached the steps which led to the children's section. Roxanne stopped and looked up toward the top.
"That's the kid section. We need to go over there." Elizabeth said gesturing ahead of them with a nod.
Roxanne completely ignored Elizabeth. "It's coming from up there." Roxanne climbed the steps and Elizabeth took the opportunity to distance herself and headed for the adult section.
Roxanne didn't even notice that Elizabeth was not with her. She was intoxicated by the fragrance and had to discover it's source. "This must be what it's like for a honey bee" She said aloud to no one. And since she was now at the top of the steps headed towards what she hoped would be the source of that fragrance.
Roxanne's nose was too high in the air to see that from behind a row of book shelves perpendicular to her flight a large foot was about to jut out and collide with her foot and thus she tripped.
"Yikes!" she exclaimed as she realized she was falling. And all eyes turned in her direction.
But the owner of the foot was quick and his arms jutted out just in time to catch Roxanne right before she struck the floor. His beefy hands closed on her arms to lift her and
the honey bee found her flower and both their lives changed forever.